Give up – Give in – Give Over

Last week I was living in the swirl of ideas. This week they have organized themselves into this posting. I hope on some level it is helpful to you.

Recently I’ve been reflecting on some realizations that I’ve resisted and these three notions, Give Up, Give In, Give Over, have been rolling around my head and heart causing some sparks of insight that have been helpful.

Specifically, I’ve been pondering these ideas around relationships with people and with groups. The concept of giving up isn’t my favorite and yet when confronted with what seems like conflict or discomfort the impulse to “cut and run” comes on strong. This is not uncommon given a strong desire for comfort, safety and peace of mind.

Last weekend I had the opportunity to be in the presence of a collective of light beings named Frank. They shared their wisdom as they do every month through the mediumship of our friend Tracy Farquhar. It seemed as if they were addressing my thoughts directly with some of their commentary. In fact, their first comment of the day was that “our natural energetic state is harmony”. And, of course when there is disharmony we notice it in one way or another. They went on to say that, “Everyone has a role. Things come to light that are not in harmony with your sense of well-being”, and went on to say, “place your focus on creating harmony in your sphere for the greater good”.

Recently I’ve found that some of my relationships and associations are not what I had once thought they were. This has caused some “disharmony” in my life and I’ve been in the process of both noticing the disconnects and evaluating my feelings and responses.

The “give up” aspect has been the strong desire to run from the conflicts by either finding ways to explain them with rationalizations in order to negate the feelings that arise, trying to ignore the feelings entirely, or walking away completely. Needless to say…that just doesn’t work for this gal…never has…never will.

The “give in” aspect has been an old construct for me that would have me simply going along with the flow in spite of a nagging feeling that the direction of that flow is contradictory to what my inner wisdom and intuition say is Truth.

And the “give over” aspect is the newest and most mature response that has me paying close attention to what is True for me, surrendering my resistance to that Truth, allowing what is, and trusting that the Universe has my back and will always guide me.

What I’ve come to realize is that it’s about where the attention is placed. I admit it’s not always easy to shift the focus, especially when feelings arise that are uncomfortable or even painful. What I am committed to doing is notice…pay attention to…and honor those feelings with reverence, then make a choice to move forward and shift focus to something different. I’m committed to allowing rather than resisting what is, with the full knowledge that I cannot change the circumstances outside of my influence. I can only change my response to them.

I’m being non-specific here because details and particulars are not important. What is important is that I am reaching for the Truth and it is reaching its long arm back to me. My own spiritual development has brought me to a place where integrity, authenticity and impeccability have become high priority qualities that, when not in alignment, call themselves out loud and clear and I cannot ignore them. In short, I can’t NOT notice when something doesn’t “feel right”. For the most part this is an inside job, me adjusting my sights and shifting my focus. I’m lucky, though, because my husband is also my most trusted confidante and I can share my process with him out loud when needed. As an empath and a “highly sensitive”, feelings are always moving through in abundance and having trusted ears to hear and loving arms to hold is a tremendous benefit. But most of the work goes on under the radar, between me and my Universal “best friend”.

All of this said, I arrive back at Give Up, Give In, Give Over. It seems this is a description of some portion of my spiritual journey; an eye-opening portion to say the least. There may be times when the impulse to give up or give in arises and I will once again have the opportunity to employ the “shift the focus” method to restore my own sense of well-being so that I can maintain my inner harmony and reach further for the Truth. What I love is that I have this little road-map on how to do it, or at least how I’ve learned to do it for myself. There is a sense of empowerment that comes with knowing how to recognize when it’s time to re-align. I think I’ll hold on to that.

I woke up this morning with a memory of the corsages the cheerleaders of my high school football team wore at every game. They were THE most beautiful chrysanthemums…huge yellow, orange and gold blooms that I adored. Today I will go out and buy some of those beautiful blooms to remind myself that I am the cheerleader of my team and the cheer is “Give Over”, loud and clear. Rah!


Illustation by James R. Easdsby

Writing this morning from a sleepy-eyed, gloomy skied, low vibrational place. As I sit gazing at an empty screen I think I may have fallen into that no man’s (woman’s in this case) land of “writer’s block”. I can feel the swirling of ideas and thoughts in my head that I’d love to share with you this week, but nothing sticks. An idea sort of teases me with a little wave then flies off into the swirl so that some other trace of an idea can surface for a micro-second to tease and wave as well. So here I sit imagining my reader (whomever you may be) and desperately wanting to engage with you about something meaningful or insightful, hoping to give you something to take with you that might lift your energy or stimulate positive change. And…I got nuthin’. Just this crazy swirly thing that is spinning just off to the right of my head taunting me with bits and pieces but nothing tangible to share. So now I engage in an exercise of surrendering to what is because try as I might to make things different, this is where I am this morning.

I’m not a formally trained writer. I have no frame of reference for this. However, I am very curious and do a lot of reading about things that interest me. Writing interests me a lot and I know that many writers find themselves looking at blank pages or screens and feel daunted by the blank page of their mind when they need to create and creation is the last thing they can deliver. I’ve had the experience as an artist, facing an empty canvas or sheet of drawing paper, brush or pencil in hand, and…”nuthin”. It happens. It happens and then it stops happening. For me it’s always surrendering to what is that allows it to “un-happen”. I have found that once I can breathe through the sense of disappointment and defeat and simply accept that “it is what it is” I can move onto something else and leave space for the energy to dissipate. And it does.

So today, my friends, I surrender – I allow – I honor – I let go and allow that swirl to swirl. I know that eventually it will slow down and ideas and thoughts will gently reveal themselves to me so that I can share with you again, and hopefully offer you something you can takeaway from my sharing that will enhance your life. Until then, “I see you”….and I hope you see me.

STRETCH: Surrender to what is. Allow…let go…let yourself off the hook. Breath and be patient knowing all is well.



So much activity in our lives right now. So much taking our attention and our energy, some coming in the form of negativity and fear. Here in my life, as I’ve said many times, I’ve chosen to limit my exposure to the anything associated with the upcoming election. This has been a good choice and has allowed me to filter much of the negativity out. It hasn’t been easy since the input is everywhere I look and in every conversation or encounter. I’ve actually managed to stretch enough to say, “I don’t really want to have this conversation.”! That has been a huge stretch for a people pleaser like me. But my well-being and sanity matter enough that I’m exercising that muscle. My throat chakra is getting a workout!!!

This morning I found an article about the Super Moon that will be rising on October 16. It’s a really good one – well they are all good ones – but this is a REALLY good one because with it comes a huge energy shift and the opportunity for some advanced positivity juju. To quote the website “The Earth Child”, www., “Astrologically speaking, the October super moon will occur when the moon is in Aries. This brings about a very active, enthusiastic, and outgoing type of energy. As such, all of the fiery and adventurous vibrations associated with Aries will be brought to the forefront and this creates a lively burst of energy. If you harness the super moon shift and embrace it in a positive light, then good changes will come your way……Overall, the shift in energy accompanying the October super moon will be overwhelmingly positive. If you relax and go with the flow you can better connect with this energy and it will lead to great things happening in your life, so get ready to welcome it!”.

I have a friend who is on a quest to affirm positivity and love every day between now and the election. Clearly the Universe supports this idea by bringing us this amazingly powerful astrological happening to ramp up our collective intentions to affirm love and unity. I love when that happens! The weather here in the northeast is gorgeous. The nights promise to be clear and crisp during this magical happy super moon and I intend to get out there and take a moon-bath every night – arms open wide to welcome this wonderful energetic shift. And when I do I will envision the moon sprinkling positivity dust all over the planet, bringing the vibration up-up-up!

One thought I had upon awakening this morning as I was preparing to write this post is that as deeply immersed in the “top stories” of the news feed as we can be, there are many other deeply compelling stories and many other things going on in the world that need attention. One that keeps coming up for me is the desperate need of the people in Haiti in the aftermath of Hurricane Matthew. I feel called to help in some way and our Common Ground Community will be directing our funds to Mercy Corps which is on the ground in Haiti now. Mercy Corps is a wonderful organization that we have known and respected for many years. I’m also aware that Bermuda is in the path of a devastating hurricane that is bearing down even as I write. Please bring your awareness to Bermuda and offer your energy and prayers for safety. In the face of the powerful elements of Mother Nature we can always offer our prayers and positive energy to the people affected.

STRETCH: Stand in your truth and exercise your throat chakra by saying “no” to conversations, media, and any energy that is not in alignment with your sense of peace and personal well-being. Take a “moon-bath” during the Super Moon and bask in the magic of the shift. Remember you can choose to focus your energy where it is desperately needed and valued.

On another note my husband, Bob, and I are celebrating our 26th wedding anniversary on October 14th. He is the rock of my life…my most trusted confidante and friend…my sensuous lover… my spiritual partner in every way. Our love deepens on a daily basis and I am the most blessed woman on the planet. I want to tell him, “Happy Anniversary my beautiful man. Here’s to much-much more. I love you from the highest high and deepest deep.”



You know the day that starts with brilliant sunshine filling your bedroom? The day that the light is so bright in your room that you can’t quite open your eyes all the way? The day when the sky is so blue and cloudless as to be almost surreal? The day when you step outside your door and feel the perfect temperature, and smell the perfume of fall, and feel a breeze that gives you just a tiny little chill? You know the day that you feel the fullness of what it means to be alive and grateful for every little tiny thing around you? You know the day when you ask the question, “How can anything be wrong in the world?”.

That was my day today. It reminded me of a day just after the September 11th attacks when the whole world was upside down, but it was the most beautiful of early fall days filled with bright sunshine and crystal clear skies. Clear except for the smoke and the heartbreak. I remember being out on the land with my husband. We went there to try to do something “normal”. We thought we’d be comforted by being as close to Mother Earth as we could get. We sat down in a field and looked at the blue sky, then at each other, then at the sky again. It was so peaceful and sweet where we were and we simply couldn’t wrap our minds around the fact that such peace could exist at the exact same moment as the fear and horror of the attacks was fresh and new and totally awful.

Today in my reverie, appreciating the beauty of this day, I was painfully aware that many people were suffering the loss of their homes and loved ones; many people were preparing for a powerful storm that has the potential to continue to take lives and homes and turn the world upside down again for millions of souls; many people are frightened and wondering how they will make it through the harrowing hours ahead.

Today’s message is not a stretch. It is a prayer. I invite you to join me in praying for the safety and protection of all of the people in the path of hurricane Matthew. May all be well; may all be safe; may all be aware of the love that surrounds them. May we all know the peace of a bright, sunny, crisp fall day.