Decisions…decisions…decisions. It seems like making decisions is a theme lately. I’ve been engaged in weighing pros and cons around a host of issues, some big life-changing issues, some smaller less dramatic issues, some right in between. I’m a Leo (proud of it too!!) but lately I feel more like a Libra with scales tipping back and forth attempting a correct “weigh-in” that will take me to the best place possible. Of course without a guarantee of some kind (good luck with that) sometimes it’s more like rolling the dice.
Once upon a time many years ago I was facing a critical decision that would change the course of my life and the lives of those I love most in the world. I had been putting extreme pressure on myself to make one of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever made. And that pressure had me paralyzed. I couldn’t see the forest for the trees. The more I tried to find the “right” choice, the more I felt stuck in the mud. Inertia had set in and it made me feel completely powerless.
I was blessed to have a guru in my life at the time. He was my venerable teacher and guide and one of the most influential people in my life. His wisdom has followed me and informs my path to this day. During this very turbulent time in my young life he offered some of the greatest guidance I’ve encountered. He said, “Can you just decide not to decide?” I remember being stunned by the question and just sat there in my chair, taking in the very simple wisdom of his suggestion. And it was in that moment that I realized that not deciding WAS a decision and I had the power to make that choice. And once I realized that I COULD make that decision I began to feel my own power returning.
The outcome of that moment had a dramatic impact on the rest of my life and I’ve dipped into that well of wisdom many times since, both for myself and in counseling others. A very simple suggestion that made all the difference to a young woman facing an uncertain future with the weight of the world on her shoulders. And now, all these years later, in the face of a list of decision “opportunities” I dip into the well once again, taking back the power that is mine and whenever and wherever I can, deciding not to decide…just for a little while. The years behind me have given me the discernment to recognize when I have the latitude to “decide not to decide” and I’m happy to share that it helps…a lot.
STRETCH: When faced with a difficult decision or choice, check in with yourself and ask if you have the latitude to “decide not to decide”. And if the answer is yes, put whatever the issue is down and allow yourself to rest. Give yourself the space you need to put it down, whatever “it” is. It’s a choice that you have the power to make.